gonna start converting myself to myspace, no one has been bothering with xanga so I got lazy. Notice the christmas motif. add queendinny if you want, I'll start using the account once I find some pretty skins and blah eventually. And shh, no laughing at the name, it's a longish story.

~LuLu~ P.S. D.Gray-man cosplay for AnimeFest? Anyone in? Vs. 2 costumes, not the Vs.1!

Just found the tape of the IkkiCon Improv. It was better live and even then it wasn't that funny but check it out if you have time x3 Itwas so fun though, I'd love to do it again, those guys are awesome xD

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=4E30606AF66409DC&page=1

~LuLu~

Though I really fell out of Harry Potter fandom with the 6th book, I suddenly had the urge to revisit the books recently... The HP world is so incredibly massive... there are over 200 characters and no other author has achieved success like J.K.Rowling. And to say that very few authors even make a living from writing even being published, or not a comfortable one at that... I'm pessimistic about becoming an author. I'd never be able to come up with so many plot twists, juggle so many characters, foreshadow so many details books ahead. I didn't grow up wanting to be an author, wasn't on newspaper staff, am not part of a writing association or even a message board and none of that really appeals to me. I can't even sit down and churn out 10 pages in a day... But I like to tell stories and I don't know what else.

But what else I do? I have no idea what type of job I'm capable of... I grew up in a cushy lifestyle so money would be very important actually but I don't think I could actually devote so much time to a job if I didn't feel like I was accomplishing something. And I'm not made of tough enough stuff to survive law school or medical school. It seems like the future is just coming so quickly...

~LuLu~ P.S. seemingly random but it occured to me along with this future stuff, I'll probably make dissapearance from the convention scene. It's such a time/money consuming hobby and I'm lazy to put in the effort anymore.

P.P.S. Darn you J.K. Rowling, you made me emo T___T

P.P.P.S. just got back today and the gate was busted.... Kim urged me to crawl under the fence which is slightly higher on the right. I did, scraped up my right arm but worst of all, I tore the hole at the knee of my FAVORITE PAIR of ripped jeans beyond repair. The pair of jeans I wore so often for TWO YEARS and Armani isn't selling ripped jeans let alone a comfy pair of ripped ultra baggy jeans anymore.... WHAT DO I DO? I LOVE THOSE PANTS!!!

I hate perfect people. I hate people who went through personal crap and depression and ect. without even letting their grades slip. I hate people who never went through a rough patch where they just weren't strong enough and hid from the world and instead it just made they focus more on their goals.

~LuLu~

If there is a god, how come those who consider suicide are never struck by a car or diagnosed with cancer? It always seems to be the ones that yearn to live that face death prematurely. Well it's just a thought really.

And are ties of blood so strong that even though time passes without connection, their importance doesn't fade? There's always so much emphasis on it but it doesn't seem so important.

~LuLu~

P.S. I'm sorry for my friends who understand what I'm going through. It doesn't seem fair that human beings go through this crap and I would hope that those I care about never have to experience any hardship at all. Especially this excess crap brought on by people and not even circumstances. I guess we can lick our wounds together.